Ken Donaldson Asks: Was it poor work life balance that caused Al and Tipper Gore to separate?
We’ll probably never know what has driven Al and Tipper Gore to separate, and out of respect and dignity, we never should. But it does invite a curiosity, and an interesting case study, regarding work life balance and its impact on your core relationships (marriage, life partnerships, etc.).
One of THE most significant parts of work life balance would be your primary, or core, relationships. These relationships are your primary support in life; THE person you can go to to discuss anything.
THE person you can go to in your most desperate times of need.
THE person you can go to to celebrate your wildest dreams.
THE person you can go to to share your most intense fears.
This is true intimacy and is often referred to as the “in-to-me-see” of the relationship!
But if you don’t take care of that relationship, cherish it, respect it, and put it at the top of your personal totem pole of life, then it becomes vulnerable to stagnation, mediocrity, strife and unnecessary breakdown.
It really comes down to priorities: We may never know Al and Tipper Gore’s priorities, but here are 7 core questions for you to ask yourself regarding your work life balance as it applies to your core relationship:
1.) Do you check in with each other regularly and share what’s REALLY going on? Not just the day-to-day superficial stuff, but the core needs, wants, desires and requests.
2.) Do you put time and energy into the relationship on a REGULAR basis? This means truly making the relationship a priority. No auto-pilot here. Conscious and proactive choices to put the relationship first whenever possible!
3.) Are you still dating regardless of how many years you’ve been together? Once a week, or more, is best.
4.) Are you able to discuss, using your best communciation skills, the toughest issues and dynamics with a level of respect, the goal of understanding and the ability to accept the differences of each other?
5.) Do you “speak your partner’s language” in that you know what it is that truly lights them up, gets into their heart and soul and enables them to feel truly extraordinary? Do you do that every day in every way?
6.) If you have children, do you and your partner work as a unified team with your children and also balance between being parents and being partners, remembering that your relationship if the foundation for the whole family unit?
7.) Whatever your passion is in your world of work, do you have a greater passion for your relationship? And if not, will you commit to find that passion because without that it’s like forgetting to put the intimacy logs on the bonfire of love and you’ll then find yourself with only smoldering ashes, or even less?
Again, we will never know what Al and Tipper Gore have gone through, but this is an ideal time for you to check in with your core relationship and honestly assess what your work life balance is and how it’s impacting your relationship.
If it’s not where you want it to be, it may be time for you to seek out a relationship counselor who can help you get back on track to have a great life, and fulfilling career and a most passionate relationship with your life partner!
“Once the realization is accepted that even between the closest human beings infinite distances continue, a wonderful living side by side can grow, if they succeed in loving the distance between them which makes it possible for each to see the other whole against the sky.” ~Rainer Maria Rilke