Fight, Flight, Fear or Free
Filed under: adversity, anxiety, boundaries, emotions, empowerment, Ken Donaldson's Blog, marry yourself first, positive thinking
Dr. Tom Hanson recently released his latest book, Play Big.
If you don’t know Dr. Tom, he’s a Tampa-based sports psychologist whose niche is helping baseball players (professional and amateur) perform optimally.
More than anything else, he helps these athletes get the inside game won.
Play Big is a fictional story about a player struggling with hitting the ball (only known as “number 21”) who serendipitously meets this extremely shrewd sage who has no name but is very wise about knowing how to win the inside game of baseball (and life).
Think The Peaceful Warrior meets Field of Dreams.
On page 179 the sage introduces the “inner caveman” as the survival and safety mechanism everyone has in their brain.
When the inner caveman perceives a threat, whether it’s real or imagined, it sets off an alarm to be on guard.
When most people feel this alarm they perceive it as anxiety and usually tense up and back away from whatever the perceived threat is.
The problem with that response pattern, whether you’re playing baseball or just interacting with life, is when you tense up and/or back away, you never perform optimally.
This is an overreaction of the “fight or flight” mechanism of the brain, known more formally as the sympathetic nervous system.
When a baseball player steps up to the plate and is in a state of fight or flight, his muscles tighten up too much and he is not able to swing the bat with his natural and instinctual capabilities.
These natural capabilities are actually wired for high performance.
Yes the athlete (and everyone, including you) is wired to succeed and excel at a very high level.
More simply put, you are wired for greatness.
The ONLY thing that gets in the way is the overreactive fight or flight mechanism.
Yes…the mind simply malfunctions at times without you truly knowing why or how.
But what activates the fight or flight mechanism?
Fear.
Fear of failure and rejection to be exact.
Back to the caveman: He needed his tribe to survive, so any threat to being ostracized from the tribe would literally be life-threatening.
In spite of all the information and technological advances and discoveries made over time, the human brain is exactly the same as caveman days.
No…there is no human brain 2.0!
This means if your inner caveman perceives that a failure may lead to rejection, which may in turn lead to being ostracized, then the sympathetic nervous system is activated and you will not perform optimally if you happen to be playing baseball.
This same dynamic is also occurs in all areas of your life and as long as it reacts this way you will not perform optimally.
Not even close, in fact.
This is why the fear of failure and the fear of rejection are so prevalent (and so destructive).
Dr. Tom really didn’t write this book for the athlete; he wrote it for everyone, as everyone can benefit from this technology.
The next question: How does someone change this response pattern?
Simple…they think differently and create a different emotional response.
Here’s an example: Think about something you do every day without much attention. Something that is almost automatic. Maybe driving, or brushing your teeth or putting on your clothes.
Most people do these tasks, and most daily tasks, automatically and very confidently.
So confidently, in fact, that they don’t even think about it much or at all.
When you engage in one of these activities, you’re being unconsciously confident and competent.
Now imagine you’re able to recreate that same automatically confident energy in other tasks that maybe have been anxiety producing in the past.
What happens when you do?
You feel calmer, more at ease and more peaceful.
And when you feel calmer, more at ease and more peaceful, you automatically feel more confident and perform optimally.
You feel free. Welcome to your greatness!
So, when you visualize yourself doing anything, always see yourself doing it with great ease, calm and peace…breathe deeply and smile, as your body will automatically calm itself with breathing and smiling.
(Yes, stress, deep breathing and smiling cannot occupy the same space at the same time. Stress is overruled by a big smile and a deep breath, and then cast out.)
And remember to stop by and say thanks to Dr. Tom….sneaky guy he is trying to convince the world that this book is about baseball.
Play Big is about life and how to win in a way that will bring you the most happiness and freedom.
That is what you want, right?
And Marry YourSelf First!
Ken Donaldson: Hidden Anguish…Men and Anxiety
Filed under: anxiety, Ken Donaldson's Blog, marry yourself first, men, mental health, therapy
(This is written for men, but ladies, feel free to read it as well.)
I see men every week in my practice who struggle with anxiety. And I know there are millions who are also suffering unnecessarily because they don’t understand what’s going on with them or are too resistant to seek out help. I too have struggled with this dreaded and unpredictable angst and I know the effects first hand both on me as a person, and as a man.
For too long we have wrestled with the stigmas of mental health issues and all the varied diagnosis. Many of us have taken on beliefs that “we’re showing our weakness if we have to ask for help.”
Nothing could be further from the truth.
It takes courage and strength to ask for help and commit to overcome anxiety. And for what it’s worth, there are, and have been, many other men who’ve wrestled with the same demons of anxiety. And many who have overcome.
Here’s a few you’ve probably heard of:
- Abraham Lincoln – President
- Al Kasha – Songwriter
- Alfred Lord Tennyson – Poet
- Anthony Hopkins – Actor
- Burt Reynolds – Actor
- Charles Schultz – Cartoonist
- Dave Stewart – Singer of Eurythmics
- David Bowie – Singer
- Dean Cain – Actor
- Dick Clark – Television Personality
- Donny Osmond – Singer/Actor
- Earl Campbell -Heisman Trophy Winner
- Edvard Munch – Artist
- Eric Clapton – Musician
- Howard Stern – “King of Media”
- Howie Mandel – Comic
- Isaac Asimov – Author
- James Garner – Actor
- Jim Eisenreich – Baseball
- John Candy – Comedian
- John Cougar Mellencamp – Musician/Actor
- John Madden – Sports Announcer
- John Steinbeck – Author
- John Stuart Mill – Philosopher
- Johnny Depp – Actor
- Michael Crichton – Writer
- Michael English – Gospel Artist
- Michael Jackson- Singer
- Nicholas Cage- Actor
- Nikola Tesla – Inventor
- Pete Harnisch – Baseball
- Ray Charles – Musician
- Robert Burns – Poet
- Robert McFarlane – Former U.S. National Security Advisor
- Sam Shepard – Playwright
- Sigmund Freud – Psychiatrist
- Sir Isaac Newton – Scientist
- Sir Laurence Olivier – Actor
- Tom Snyder – Host
- Tony Dow – Actor, Director
- W.B. Yeats – Poet
- Willard Scott – Weatherman
The REALLY good news is that there is effective treatment for anxiety and quite frankly, it’s one of the simplest issues to address and correct.
But here are some rather alarming statistics about anxiety:
• Anxiety disorders are the most common mental illness in the U.S., affecting 40 million adults in the United States age 18 and older (18.1% of U.S. population).
• Anxiety disorders cost the U.S. more than $42 billion a year, almost one-third of the country’s $148 billion total mental health bill.
• More than $22.84 billion of those costs are associated with the repeated use of health care services; people with anxiety disorders seek relief for symptoms that mimic physical illnesses.
• People with an anxiety disorder are three to five times more likely to go to the doctor and six times more likely to be hospitalized for psychiatric disorders than those who do not suffer from anxiety disorders.
(~The Anxiety Disorders Association of America)
Whether you’re male or female, you don’t have to suffer.
But guys, let go of the machismo and ask for help. You’ll be happier than ever that you did.
And you’ll join the long list of other men who have done the same.
Call me…let’s get started today..(727) 394-7325
Marry YourSelf First!…Today and every day!
RAPID RESOLUTION THERAPY
RAPID RESOLUTION THERAPY™: THE MOST POWERFUL AND EFFECTIVE PSYCHOTHERAPY TOOL TODAY TO ELIMINATE ANXIETY, DEPRESSION AND ADDICTION CRAVINGS AND IMMEDIATELY EXPERIENCE FAST, PAINLESS AND LASTING DESIRED CHANGE
Rapid Resolution Therapy™ is fast, lasting and painless!
Yes, Rapid Resolution Therapy™ is a unique and innovative method to help you painlessly complete the therapeutic process. No longer are you required to relive the past or feel the pain from traumatic events. Imagine having unwanted thoughts and behaviors eliminated! Unconscious conflicts blocking desired change are resolved. Self destructive behavior disappears. The mind is clear. There is emotional freedom.
IS THAT GREAT OR IS THAT GREAT??!!
Clients gain benefits that reach well beyond their goals for seeking treatment. They report an immediate and lasting increase in energy, clarity and well-being. The mind is cleared, organized and optimized. Because the root cause of problems is cleared, these positive changes are automatic and lasting.
Clients realize fully and through every facet of their minds that these experiences are finished and gone. Anxiety and problem anger are replaced with energy and peace. And old self destructive behavioral patterns are dissolved.
Jon Connelly is the founder and developer of Rapid Resolution Therapy™ and I started my training with Jon 12 years ago and continue to use his state-of-the-art Rapid Resolution Therapy™ with all my clients. The results I’ve witnessed are just short of miraculous!See what everyone is saying at Jon’s website at:
http://www.rapidtraumaresolution.org/
Listen and watch Jon Connelly, the founder and developer of Rapid Resolution Therapy™, and some of the people he’s treated with Rapid Resolution Therapy™ :
TRAUMA: GHOSTS FROM THE PAST
What is Trauma? Trauma is not necessarily tragic. It can be any past event, whether simple or difficult, that was upsetting, confusing, weird, painful or distressful. Although that event is done and over, the effects of it continue to have an underlying affect on a person.
A psychological trauma is an emotional wound or shock that creates substantial, lasting damage. People can be affected by troubling experiences from the past, even when these events are not consciously remembered.
Emotional problems and destructive behavioral patterns are impossible to overcome when they are fueled by the ongoing influence of traumatic past events.
Unresolved, these issues also increase vulnerability to medical problems.
Attempting to bring about enduring change without eliminating the ongoing influence of these “ghosts from the past” is like trying to repair the structure of a building by applying a coat of paint.
Rapid Resolution Therapy™ completely eliminates the negative influence from traumatic events even when there is no conscious memory of what took place.
RAPID RESOLUTION THERAPY™ AND UNREALISTIC FEARS
No one can eliminate a fear of flying by studying statistics that prove it is safe. Logic can only influence the conscious mind. The subconscious mind cannot respond to logic or reason.
Think of a person who is smoking, overeating or abusing any substance. This person already knows that the problem behavior is not logical. They know the negative consequences. The subconscious mind continues causing the problem because the subconscious mind isn’t logical.
Rapid Resolution Therapy™ addresses unrealistic fears, generalized anxiety and specific phobias by bringing blocked unconscious conflicts into the light and thereby allowing you to live in the desired change state you ultimately want.This includes (but is NOT limited to):
• Fear of public speaking
• Fear of new places
• Fear of flying
• Fear of heights
• Fear of closed places
• Fear of being alone
• Fear of meeting new people
• Test anxiety
• Performance anxiety
• Shyness
• And even the fear of roller coasters!
My goal is simple: I want to improve the quality of your life as quickly, permanently and painlessly as possible!
Traditional therapists have been taught to convince their clients to “take responsibility” so that they can “work on their problems.” Psychotherapy used to be focused on the patient’s past.
Traditional psychotherapy took a long time, encouraged dependency, and required a painful re-living of past experiences and much of the time it didn’t even work!
Today, psychotherapists are being taught cognitive behavioral approaches that ignore the ongoing influence of past events. However, cognitive behavioral – and solution oriented approaches – ignore the ongoing influence of past events on current problems.
Rapid Resolution Therapy™ facilitates effortless change that comes from deep within the mind. We will get right to the subconscious mind and make the necessary adjustments so that the problems disappear. You’ll achieve fast and lasting improvements!
Rapid Resolution Therapy™ will:
• Engage all facets of the mind with profound connection using precise multi-level communication
• Open a channel to the subconscious
• Expose and eliminate unconscious conflicts blocking desired change
• Pinpoint the exact events to clear so that desired change is automatic
• Eliminate the effect of traumatic events even if they are repressed or forgotten
• Stop self-destructive behavioral patterns
• Resolve multiple traumas in a single psychotherapy session
• Transform your attitude, emotions, behavior, beliefs, expectations and perceived identity so your life can once again be joyful and productive!
• Promote healing
Plus, the same techniques used in Rapid Resolution Therapy™ can be used to help you in all areas of performance enhancement. This includes:
• Academics and test-taking
• Sports and athletics
• Singing and dancing
• Acting and speaking
• Dating
• Sex and relationships
• Work and career advancement
• Business networking
Why suffer with worry and anxiety when you can have freedom, peace and confidence!!??
RAPID RESOLUTION THERAPY™ INVOLVES:
• Uncovering techniques
• Multi-level communication
• Fool proof convincers
• Breakthrough memory blocks
• Transformational language
• Communication that bypasses the conscious mind
• Disassembling unnecessary emotion
• Deactivating impulsive behavior
• Failure proof communication
• Mind/body healing
• Subconscious activators & accelerators
• Dynamic imagery
• Dream resolution
• Pain relief
What does NOT happen with Rapid Trauma Resolution™? I will NOT ask you to:
• Move your eyes back and forth
• Travel in your mind to a pretend safe place
• Feel painful emotions to “get them out”
• Tap your body while repeating special words
• Nurture your inner child
• Beat pillows or furniture to get your anger out
• Pretend to confront the abuser
• Actually confront the abuser
• Attend groups to get support
• Go into a trance and listen to positive suggestion
(I’m almost embarrassed to admit that I used to use all these techniques and although they do sometimes work, Rapid Resolution Therapy™ is much more effective, efficient and painless!)
Rapid Resolution Therapy™ provides solutions for life’s toughest problems…
People who have experienced:
- Incest
- Rape
- Sexual violence
- Physical or sexual abuse
- Violence
- Domestic Violence
- Family dysfunction
- Verbal abuse
- Terrifying events
- Crime
- Wartime horror
- Injury or illness
- Natural disasters
- Death of a loved one
- Murder/suicide of a loved one
- Loss of relationship
- Bullying
- Humiliation
- Betrayal
- Infidelity
- Abandonment
And for people who continue to suffer with:
- Stress related medical problems
- Panic attacks
- Sexual dysfunction
- Nightmares
- Self injury
- Dissociation
- Flashbacks
- Insomnia
- Eating disorders
- Depression
- Anxiety
- Guilt and Shame
- Self-hatred
- Substance abuse
- Problem anger
- Sex addiction
- Compulsive behavior
- Obsessive thinking
- Phobias
- Addiction – dependency
If you desire change that is automatic and lasting, then you’re an ideal candidate for Rapid Resolution Therapy™. Many people prefer Rapid Resolution Therapy™ over spending months or years in weekly traditional therapy sessions. In many cases Rapid Resolution Therapy™ treatments can be completed in a single office visit. Some treatments may take two or three sessions.
If you are tired of traditional therapies that have not worked or were too painful; this is the answer you’ve been seeking.
complimentary telephone
consultation!
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Marry YourSelf First! Audio
Marry YourSelf First is now available on audio! Click here to learn more
Men and Depression
Why The Hell Am I Feeling This Way? Men and Depression: For all Men and the Women who love them Click Here
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