9 Cat Lessons on Boundaries, Relaxation, Persistence and Life…
I’d like to introduce you to a friend of mine: Jzumbula Kittae la Kunta.
I call her “Kunta” and she’s a cat.
Cats are interesting creatures and Kunta has taught me a number of lessons I wanted to pass on to you.
Nine of them, in fact…fitting since cats allegedly have 9 lives.
I think Kunta had closer to 49 lives.
Lesson #1: Ask for what you want.
Kunta showed up outside my front window about 15 years ago. She looked in and meowed several times. I believe that was her way of telling me she wanted something: Food.
I gave her some food and, as they say, the rest was history.
Lesson #2: Don’t do what you don’t want to do.
After she showed up, announced her presence and made her request, I figured this cute little cat would let me pet her.
“Not!”
No, she wouldn’t let me get close enough to touch her for almost a month. And then she wouldn’t come inside the house for at least another month.
Good boundaries!
Lesson #3: Have pride.
In her earlier years, Kunta was quite the huntress. I won’t list all the different “critters” that were sacrificed, but I will tell you that Kunta often left their remains outside the front door.
Yes, it’s good to show off your talents, even though the rest of the world may not fully understand nor accept them.
Lesson #4: Relax.
Kunta spent most of the hours of her life doing what I think she liked best: Sleeping.
She’d usually find a nice shady spot in the bushes or under a neighbor’s car…and she’d spend hours curled up or sprawled out, enjoying the fine art of doing absolutely nothing.
Sometimes it’s good to do nothing.
Lesson #5: Go at your own pace.
Up until about 5 years ago, Kunta was never a “lap cat.” She then decided that she wanted to spend some time on my lap. However the amount of time and frequency was based on only one thing: Her.
She definitely marched to the beat of her own drum and made her own decisions.
Yes, it’s best to go at your own pace, not the pace of others.
Lesson #6: Persistence.
Kunta never weighed more than 8 pounds…”Skinny Kitty” is what I called her sometimes.
In spite of her petite size, she knew when she wanted to eat and let me know in no uncertain terms.
She had a meow that was closer to a bark and she would sit right outside my window “talking” until I let her in to get food. If I ignored her too long, she would start pulling on the screen.
She never went away without getting what she wanted.
A good reminder for all of us: Never quit.
Lesson #7: Be picky.
In the summertime, which is about 80% of the time here in Florida, Kunta always wanted to stay outside. But as soon as it got a bit chilly, she was outside the window, making her requests be known, regardless of what time it was.
Of course, she then also wanted to snuggle in my bed to stay warm…followed by early morning wake-ups to go back out again.
It’s good to pick and choose exactly what you want, when you want it.
Lesson #8: Be tough.
At 8 pounds and very skinny, you might think she was easy prey for the other cats in the ‘hood…nope, not even close!
She would climb a tree next to the house and sit on the roof as a way to have the advantage should some other cat want to mess with her.
Pretty smart, I’d say.
Of course, she never backed down either. I saw her run cats twice the size of her out of the yard. I believe she was fearless.
Courage will take you a long way in life.
Lesson #9: Play.
Kunta never played much. Catnip never did anything for her. Toys seemed to bore her. And the old piece of string got some interest, but I think she knew they were all fake. She like to play with the real thing: Chasing squirrels and birds and snakes.
Every once in a while she’d go running through the house from one side to the other,
…but only when she was in the mood.
Playing occasionally and in your own unique way is good for the soul.
I could go on and on about other lessons and stories, but I think you get the picture: Even cats can be powerful teachers if we are simply open to the lessons.
Kunta decided a couple weeks ago that it was time to become a butterfly, so she made her great transition.
And now I’m learning a whole new set of lessons that I’ll be passing on to you…I hope you enjoy them!
Read more about Ken Donaldson here!
Ken Donaldson, Marry YourSelf First and Life Balance
Here’s something everyone can relate to: Your Car.
That wonderful and amazing piece of technology that takes you from one place to another…
usually without any difficulty.
And what is one big element the car relies on to get you there?
The tires…those round rubber donuts which “usually”
create no problems.
Let’s talk about your tires…stick with me here… it’ll all start to make sense…
I promise!
Think of your life as being a car and your tires as one of the most important dynamics to get you
where you want to be in your life.
Each of the tires have an important role, so let’s take a closer look at the tires…
Tire #1: The Know YourSelf Tire
This tire consists of your purpose, your values and your vision.
Take the time now to answer the following questions:
Why am I here (purpose)?
Where am I going (vision)?
What’s most important (values)?
If this tire is not properly aligned, balanced or inflated, your car will not work properly and
you’re likely to have a breakdown on the Highway of Life.
And THAT would be a HUGE bummer!
Tire #2: The Love YourSelf Tire
This tire consists of the ways you affirm yourself, talk to yourself, talk about yourself and
the balance (or lack thereof ) you have in your life.
Answer these questions now:
What good things do I say to myself every day?
How do I celebrate me every day?
How do I love myself every day?
How do I keep myself healthy every day?
Like tire #1, if this tire is not properly aligned, balanced or inflated, your car will
not work properly and you’re likely – again – to have a breakdown on the Highway of Life.
More bummers!
Tire #3: The Believe in YourSelf Tire
This tire consists of your self-confidence, your communication capabilities, and your ability
to “Play Big” in life.
Answer these additional questions now:
How do I strengthen my confidence muscle?
How do I expand my communication skills?
How can I play bigger and bigger every day in Life?
Yes, like tires #1 and #2, if this tire is not properly aligned, balanced or inflated, your car
will not work properly and you’re most likely to have a breakdown on the Highway of Life.
Breakdowns like these are unnecessary and HUGE bummers!
Tire #4: The Guide YourSelf Tire
This tire consists of your boundaries, priority management and stress management skills.
Answer these last questions now:
How do I evaluate my boundaries?
How do I prioritize my life?
How do I manage stress in my life?
I’m sure you’re catching on…yes, like tires #1, #2 and #3, if this tire is not properly
aligned, balanced or inflated, you’re likely to have a breakdown on the Highway of Life.
And another bummer!
NOW, the only other question is:
What are you going to do about all this?
One answer…and you know what it is:
Marry YourSelf First!
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If for some reason you haven’t gotten your copy yet, today is the day.
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If you have your copy, but aren’t using it AND all the wonderful supports and bonuses…
what are you waiting for? A Breakdown???
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Invest in some books (the package deals are great for the holidays AND you’ll
get FREE books!) now and keep your tires in alignment, balanced and inflated and
you’ll get further in life than you ever imagined!
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Go get your tire situation straightened out now.
At least answer those 13 questions for yourself… they may be
the most important questions you ever ask yourself!
And Marry YourSelf First every day…in every way!
And have an awesome weekend!
Peace and Prosperity…
Ken
Marry YourSelf First and The ABC’s of Success
The ABC’s of Success
A stands for Attraction; more specifically the Law of Attraction.
The Law of Attraction states that like energies attract each other.
Positive attracts positive and negative attracts negative. Therefore,
if you are putting out negative energy you will therefore attract negative
energy into your life. Likewise, if you are putting out positive energy
you will attract positive energy into your life.
So the question is: What vibration are you sending out? If it is negative,
how about experimenting with some new ways of managing your life
to create more positive energy?
See Chapter 2 in Marry YourSelf First!: Doing the Abun-Dance:
The Law of Attraction and the Art of Prosperous Living
http://kendonaldson.com/store/
B stands for Boundaries; and that includes both the boundaries
you have with others and the boundaries you have with yourself.
Saying “No” to something that is unacceptable is an example of a boundary,
as is assertively and proactively asking for what you do want.
Your boundaries with yourself will determine how much balance you have
in your life. Knowing where to end one part of your life (i.e.: Work) and
begin another (i.e.: Family) will help you to stay in touch with your whole
being and therefore create more balance, which, in turn, always results in a
happier and healthier lifestyle.
Do you know your boundaries and are you living according to them?
See Chapters 4 and 5 in Marry YourSelf First!:
4 – The Apples in the Apple Pie:
Knowing What You’ve Got to Have, Want to Have, and Will Not Settle For
And
5- Juggling Bowling Balls While Walking Across Hot Coals:
The Balance Challenge of Life
http://kendonaldson.com/store/
C stands for Communication; specifically your ability to attain and
maintain productive communication with others.
Do you know how to avoid getting “hooked” by another’s
manipulative maneuvering? Do you speak up for yourself,
express your feelings and make your requests directly?
These are all examples of healthy communication skills.
And perhaps the biggest communication skill is that of listening. Do
you know how to combine martial artistry with your listening ability to
create a space of “Zen Listening” in which you can be unaffected by
what another may say but still stay in the conversation?
See Chapter 7 in Marry YourSelf First!: Communication Poker:
Knowing When to Hold `em, Show `em and Fold `em
http://kendonaldson.com/store/
D stands for Deal-makers and Deal-breakers; specifically
your ability to know them and adhere to them.
If you have not written your lists of deal-makers and deal-breakers,
then you are potentially setting yourself up to settle for something
or someone beneath your standards. When you settle for less you
impact your self-esteem and distort your sense of reality.
The bottom-line is that living life without knowing or adhering to
your deal-makers and deal-breakers sets you up for failure, depression,
anxiety and addictive behavior. Now, you don’t want any of that, right??!!
Write your Deal-makers and Deal-breakers lists TODAY!!
See Chapters 4, 5, 6 and 8 in Marry YourSelf First!:
6- Getting the Love: Surrounding Yourself with
Supportive Networks and Communities
And
8- Building Your House on Solid Ground:
Understanding the Relationship Hierarchy
http://kendonaldson.com/store/
E stands for Emotional Management; specifically the
management of the “slipperier” emotions.
This would include anger, fear and sadness.
Most of us have not had any training on how to deal
with these so we have made up our own “rules” about these emotions.
Many of these “rules” are very unrealistic and unhealthy.
The bottom-line is that you are an emotional being and you have every
right to feel and express your feelings as long as you do no harm to
others as you are expressing yourself.
Fear is perhaps THE most challenging emotion, but remember:
You can have FEAR (Fictitious Events Appearing Real) or
FEAR (Face Everything And Rejoice).
Which do you choose??
See Chapters 3 and 9 in Marry YourSelf First!:
3- In Search of the Missing Donut Hole: Your Soul Print
And
9- If It Feels Weird, Do It:
Getting Out of Your Comfort Zone and Into Your Growth Zone
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There you go: A whole new way of living your
ABC’s that you’ll never be too old for!!
And a few more valid reasons to Marry YourSelf First!
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Read more from Ken Donaldson here…
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