Relationships: Why is it that some people seem to have such ease with them, and other people seem to chronically struggle with them?

Perhaps it’s because some people have prepared themselves and others haven’t.

From my 25 years of experience working with people on the frontlines and in the trenches of their relationship challenges, I have discovered that some people plan and some people don’t.

Sounds too simplistic, doesn’t it?!!

It’s not, as the same rules apply for business. The successful businesses have plans and those that are not successful, don’t.

Simple, yes, but very true.

By now, you’ve heard the saying that “people don’t plan to fail; they just fail to plan.” This saying is most likely the cause of relationship success (and failure).

In fact, there are ten primary factors that I have seen people who are more successful in their relationships use over and over.

Would you like to know what these ten factors are?

Cool!

Maybe the easiest way to introduce them is through a self-evaluation.

Consider this the “10 Step Program for Relationship Success.”

The following evaluation will assist you in assessing your life which, if you didn’t know, is the foundation for all healthy relationships.

At the same time of providing you with helpful feedback to create a happy life and an exciting career, this simple test will direct you to develop the core essentials to create the healthiest relationships possible.

Feel free to share this with your friends, family and loved ones and ask for their input and feedback.

On the following ten items, rate each item using a 0 to 10 scale:

• 8-10: Good; this area of my life is strong and supports my success in life
• 5-7:   OK; this area needs to be strengthened for me to be truly successful
• 0-4:   Needs Work; this area could stop me from going forward and being successful

1.  Vision: I have an exciting Vision for my life and I’m clear where I’m going in life.

2.  Purpose: I have a deep understanding of my Life Purpose and the importance of it in my life and in the lives of others I impact.

3.  Values and Priorities: I know my values and have taken the time to write down the ten most important values of my life. I also know my day-to-day priorities that keep me focused.

4.  Soul Food and Spirituality: I am aware of the activities, people, places and events which energize me and feed my personal spirituality.

5.  Boundaries: I am aware of the boundaries I need to keep with myself and I’m confident about setting boundaries with others, all of which support my Vision, Purpose and Values.

6.  Support Network: I have a powerful support network I use regularly. I ask for assistance in getting past stuck points and I use the power of the “MasterMind” to generate new ideas and solutions.

7.  Life Balance: I regularly evaluate and have a measurable system to check my life balance and I make the necessary adjustments, while also realizing that life is always moving and there is no perfect balance.

8.  Communication: I am comfortable using the most assertive communication tactics necessary to get my needs met and my goals accomplished. I especially practice my listening skills as I realize that listening is the most powerful part of effective communication.

9.  Living in the Present: I am always focused on being in the present (rather than the past or the future) and I have moved past old hurts, resentments and/or trauma.

10.  Flexible: I know that I am “perfectly imperfect” and I use humor, light-heartedness and silliness to manage any and all stress, and I avoid becoming overly serious about anything!

Total your score and let’s see how you did:

80-100= Green Light: You’re on track for highly successful relationships…keep growing forward!

50-79=Yellow Light: There are some areas of your life that need attention in order for you to truly have the relationship you desire.

0-49=RED LIGHT: It’s time to put YOU first and focus on these foundational areas that will support all your future success, especially in your relationships.

There you go: A brand new 10 Step Program for Relationship Success.

Master these ten areas and not only will you have extraordinary relationships, but you’ll also have an extraordinary life.

After all, the two do go together!

More from Ken Donaldson…

Marry YourSelf First!

With thousands of chapters, it’s
the biggest networking group in the world.

So, why did I join earlier this year?

Here’s one reason:
Last year BNI passed 5.6 million referrals,
which generated over $2.3 billion dollars!

Yes…I wanted to, and continue to want to,
grow my business.

But that’s not the real reason I joined…
the REAL reason I joined was simply to
make connections.

And I know, after all these years,
the more connections I have,
the more business I have,
and the more money I make.

BUT…it wasn’t all about the money…nope!

I knew that BNI ran a “very tight ship”,
meaning that they were structured
and organized, and they challenged their
members to “raise the bar” on themselves.

I needed that challenge…
and I’m so happy I’ve taken it on.

BNI has extraordinary education programs and
they have a system that operates under
one simple formula: Givers Gain!

You know, like “Pay It Forward”,
“You Reap What You Sow”, etc.

I like that because that’s how I run my business today.

For years I ran it the other way
(or, better put, it ran me!):
Go chase down the business and
get as much as I could from it.

Nothing wrong with that model,
but I found when I just simply
do the “right thing” and
give all I can, and
be smart about my business,
I am rewarded…abundantly!

PLUS, I am now getting ready to
launch a new program –
1M×3: 1 Million Times 3–
that is based entirely on the
Givers Gain philosophy.

1 Million Times 3:
Sell 1 Million Books
Raise $1 Million for Charity
Donate 1 Million Books

(Read a brief overview at
http://kendonaldson.com/1mx3/ )

So I figured getting involved with
an organization that promotes,
practices and teaches the Givers Gain
philosophy would be the
place for me to be!

Plus, since I’ll need  many people involved to make this work,
I knew that the people I meet in BNI would be the perfect
people to make connections with!

So…I would like to personally invite YOU to a BNI meeting…
Go to http://www.bni.com/ to find one near you…
check it out…
tell them Ken from Tampa, Florida sent you!

Better yet, if you live in the Tampa Bay area,
I’d like to invite you out this Thursday (10/15), as I’ll be
giving my 10 minute “Zero to Hero” talk.

Every week a couple members have the chance to
share with the chapter how the chapter can
best support them.

I plan to share a bit of my personal story
(the VERY condensed version) and then share
the 1M×3 program with the members and invite
them to support the program.

Here’s our chapter info:
http://bnisuccessmasters.com/

If you can make it, that would be great…
FYI: there is a small $5 fee for the room.

If you can’t, you’re welcome to come out any
Thursday morning and check it out.

I’d love to have you join me.

Regardless, know this: Your Net Worth
equals your Self Worth plus your Network.

Think about it!

Ken Donaldson answers your questions here…