Ken Donaldson and The A-Z of Happy, Healthy and Harmonious Relationships
Here’s a great cheat sheet for your relational intelligence.
• Assertiveness: Say what you mean, mean what you say, and never say it mean.
• Boundaries: With yourself first; then others… ”No” is a complete sentence.
• Communication: Still one of the cornerstones of healthy relationships (See Assertiveness).
• Deal Makers/Deal Breakers: Say “Yes” to your Yes’ and “No” to your No’s.
• Emotional Management: Feel them; Heal them; Deal with them…then move on.
• Focus-Fear-Faith: Do you focus on fear or faith?…your choice.
• God: Is there a spiritual conversation here?
• Humor: Wear a clown nose before every fight …it’ll eliminate most of them.
• Integrity: Be whole, open, honest and forthright.
• Jealousy: Just in case it shows up, know how to deal with it (and any other yucky dynamics too).
• Ken on Call: Always have a coach/counselor you can rely on.
• Logs on the Fire: Keep the passion growing and growing…don’t let the fire go out…ever!
• Most Important: The most important thing is the most important thing…priorities 101.
• NO Blame, Shame or Games!: See integrity.
• Openness: The gateway to the Heart has to be open to let the Love in.
• Purpose: What is the purpose of this relationship? Make it bigger than the two of you.
• Questions: Ask in the direction of the solution, not in the direction of the problem.
• Rituals: Daily, positive, growth-enhancing and fun …got it?!!
• Support Networks: Where/who do you go to for yours? We all need support.
• Tongue-Foo Fighting: Know how to be the bull-fighter of tongue-foo and arguments go away real fast and in a real loving way.
• Understanding: “Do you understand me?” If not, then listen more and deeper.
• Validation: We all want this and it’s often withheld or overlooked…give it away generously!
• Work-Life Balance: See Boundaries and Deal-Makers/Deal Breakers.
• X(Ex)Relationship Baggage: Live in the present not the past…see Ken on Call if you can’t do this.
• Yesterday-Today-Tomorrow: Where do you live… live your best today in today.
• Zealousness: Not too much, not too little, just right in the middle.
And Marry YourSelf First!