Roots, Trees and Emotional Intelligence

Roots, Trees and Emotional Intelligence may seem like an unusual title, but stick with me, as it’ll all make sense (I hope) in the end.

I completely fell in love with the beautiful Royal Poinciana (Delonix regia) tree. If you live in Florida, or other areas with a similar climate and geography, you’ve likely seen these beauties around this time of the year. Their abundant striking orange flowers will catch and wake-up even the most preoccupied mind and eyes.

About four years ago I decided I wanted one for my yard so I bought one and planted it right in the middle of the front yard. Within a year this 5-foot stick turned into a huge 20-foot tree that started to bloom. The second year was even better and there were many blossoms.

However, the following winter was apparently too cold and the tree died. I felt sad as the tree guys hauled away the last of the trunk and branches. I figured this was just one of these “ebbs and flows” of life and I moved on.

About a year ago I noticed what I thought was a large weed in my front yard and was ready to pull it out until I noticed that the leaves looked familiar. Could it be the Poinciana coming back to life?

I left it alone and monitored it and, sure enough, the Poinciana was making a comeback.

Today there are now 3 new trees that have resurrected themselves from the original root, ranging between 6 and 12 feet in height. And just this past week, the first of the new flowers (see the picture above) also presented themselves.

This all invited me to ponder a bit about this “miraculous” occurrence.

I have often used the analogy of the tree and its roots to demonstrate how the roots always predict the fruit of the tree, meaning how our core belief system about life and ourselves dictates our behavior and outcomes in life.

I’ve also repeated the words of a few of my teachers in “what you can’t see is more powerful than what you can see.” I couldn’t see what was happening in the root system of my tree, but obviously in this case, what I couldn’t see was much more powerful than what I could see.

I just wasn’t expecting this “life lesson” to show up in my own front yard.

Here are the take-aways for you to try on:

1.) No matter how terrible the loss might look (my tree dying), if your beliefs (the roots) are strong enough, you will always rise again. Which means that no matter what others may say or think, as long as you believe in yourself, you’ll be okay, you’ll rise again and you’ll always continue to grow, even in the midst of what appears to be irreversible loss.

Try this on and see how it works for you.

2.) And a reminder that what goes on in those deeper and higher levels of life, in the subconscious and the super-conscious, is really what is dictating your growth.

Things are often not as they seem. It’s easy to allow emotions to dictate what seems to be (like dead trees and other losses and failures) when actually that may not be the truth at all.

Sometimes it is much more emotionally intelligent to remind yourself of the core truths about yourself.

Not sure what core truths are? Start with these 3 surefire winners. I am:

  • Deserving of love.
  • Worthy.
  • Good.

And remember: What goes on beneath the surface IS more powerful than what goes on above the surface.

Protect your roots. Fertilize them with positive and affirming messages about yourself.

And one day, you’ll see new growth and new flowers in your world!

Be emotionally intelligent. It’s better than all your book smarts put together.


 Marry YourSelf First!

About Ken Donaldson

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